Why now?

Yesterday sangat lah disaster. Why sbb I'm about to break off suddenly my ex text me, he want to be together again. He asked we whether if I can be his girlfriend back. And I was so shocked! Dah la tengah cerita dengan kawan how to solve my current problem. Eceh macam lah masalah besar :P So waktu siangnya he (so-called bf) call me early morning, but I did not picked up. Sbb tido lagi. Then he text me a good morning msg, still i did'nt reply :P Then tengah hari he called. He asked me why did'nt pick up the phone and text him, apa lagi fikir alasan lah. Sidai kain lah apa lah. Tapi mmg tengah buat kerja pun. Tak kan nak cerita detail kot kat dia. Lepas tu dia ajak keluar nk celebrate birthday A. Dia belanja mcd tapi aku malas nk keluar, actually maluu hahaha and not ready of course. Then dia tanya bila nk pegi shah alam, ckp lah 7 or 8 ni. He mention that his birthday is on 6th . Alamakkk!!! So kalau boleh he wanna meet up la on his birthday! Grr! Pastu aku pun jawab lah tak tahu la apa la busy la. Pastu dia dengan kecewa ckp tak pe lah.. then, he asked tak kan tak boleh bagi masa sikit kot. And I was like hmm tgk lah, tgk lah mcm mana -.- Kill me now!

So tadi  mama ajak keluar. I've been waiting the mum daughter day out hehe. Tapi Helmi and Adik ikut sekali so mcm tak dapat juga lah nk cerita kat mama. Then we went to Johnny's for breakfast. Sbb kitaorg keluar rumah pukul 10 lebih macam tu. Makan makan makan, tiba tiba adik  nk keluar jap pegi mana tah, So ada mama, me and Helmi. At that time aku pun cerita lah kat mama, so Helmi pun dengar and tak habis2 tanya siapa that guy. Habis semua org yang datang open house dia teka! haha. "Yang dua orang tu eh?" Yang tu eh yang ni eh? hahhaah kelakar pulak. Mama pulak, siapa? siapa? Aku ckp lah mama tak kenal. Then mama mention my crush name! and I was like duh! dia dah ada girlfriend la mama... :( Pastu mama ckp mama pun mcm perasan dia mcm suka kat kamu. Aaaa! Berbungan kejap hati hahah :P Then Helmi sampuk aku rasa semua yang datang tu macam suka kat kau je. Aku tgk cara diorang pun mcm dah tahu. HAHHAHA Helmi, ko gila? Ye lah mama and Helmi ckp macam tu sbb yang datang pun semuanya LELAKI. Most of my friends are boys! Girls pun ramai. Aku ni kawan je dgn sesiapa pun. Tapi yang girls ni tak datang sbb ada kerja lah apa lah. So tulah ceritanya. And and I have friend, a boy. We're close and dah kira bestfriend la. So bila cerita kat dia, dia mcm membantu, tapi at the same time cara dia cakap tu macam dia pun suka kat aku. *bukan nk perasan tapi betul!* Mama pun cakap macam tu. Hah sudah! Sekarnag tiba tiba saham naik pulak! :P Jadi aku ni ramai jugak lah peminat hahaha, bukan itu nak di banggakan it just tak sangka la. Ingat selama ni tak de org suka or tak de orang nk ambil tahu pun.

So girls percayalah sebenarnya ada orang yang rindu, suka, or teringat kat kita :) Don't worry! :) Till then byee :)

The Plan

The plan is my friend, L and I are planning some sort of vacation/meeting friend to Tasmania. Actually we got friend there which I name her, E hehe. Malas nak tulis panjang panjang. We've been plan this since E further their study. But biasa lah aku bukannya loaded sangat, So L and I start saving money. The problem is, L dah kerja so senang lah dia nak saving. Now duit dia pun dah cukup! Tinggal aku je belum. He start force me to menabung cepat cepat coz he too excited to go there! Siapa tak excited, aku pun excited! It just the money is not enough! Tak cecah 1k pun, plus I wanna buy new phone which is iphone, tapi tu pun  mahal. So kena pertimbang kan jugak lah. But now rasa nk pergi sana membuak-buak pulak. Maybe nak beli phone tu dah jadi second priority haha. So now tgh saving my money to go there! and I had a girls talk with K, she was excited too and she want to go with us, since K just finished her study and waiting for the job, so senang lah nak kumpul duit kan kan! :(

Kalau aku dah cukup duit, mungkin sekarang ni dah kat Tassy dah! So how am I going to get a lots of money? All I've been thinking is from the ptptn loan hahhaahaha :P I know tu salah tapi still I wanna go!!!!!! Plus entah cukup ke tak, ptptn tu kan untuk makan, buku lagi, tambang balik rumah lagi macam lah cukup. Jadi masalahnya ialah DUIT!!! Keching keching! hehe Tapi insyaAllah Allah tu maha mendengar, mana lah tahu ada orang nak derma ke kikiki ada org nk belanja ke? ada org nak bagi duit ke? Who knows? *angkat kening* So we are plan to go next year! Arghhh I can't wait to go there! So total money that I need to have is RM4000! Yeah I know it's A LOT!!!!!!!! Urghhh, but I think 3000 maybe enough :P So from now on I need to saving moree!!

Ya Allah permudahkanlah urusan ku ini, dan murahkan lah rezeki ku dan makbulkan lah hajat ku untuk ke sana. Amin  :)

My Love - JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE

Yeah, because
I can see us holding hands
Walking on the beach, our toes in the sand
I can see us on the countryside
Sitting on the grass, laying side by side
You could be my baby, let me make you my lady
Girl, you amaze me
Ain't gotta do nothing crazy
See, all I want you to do is be my love

:)

Midnight

I mean you, not him.

I'm sorry

I so-called in relationship with this guy, a friend of mine. I feel kesian lah kat dia. I treat him like nothing going on with us. While he, so care and love about me. Duh! This thing cannot go on anymore. I want to tell him I wanna break up, it just rasa tak sampai hati la nak cakap. So how. Kalau biar je, tak baik lah kita dah la tak ada perasaan, dia pulak bersungguh ingat kat kita, call, texting and so on. Tapi aku ni plain je tak de feeling langsung. When he ask whether I miss him or not, I can't say yes. Cause I don't miss him. So I replied "biasa je". I know dia kecewa bila jawap macam tu, what else I would say. Think I have a big problem now! and now he did'nt call me "awk" but he switch to other which every couple use. And I was like err!?!@#$%^&* I can't use that word. I don't feel like wanna use that. So I keep using "awk" instead of that word.

I feel very bad. Dah la dia masuk hospital. Tak sakit teruk pun., dia nak check mata je tapi apa tah kena stable darah and bla bla bla. I did not visit him once pun. So tadi dia call and text and I tak perasan. So dengan rasa bersalah I call him. For the first time! :P He asked me why I did not reply his msg, padahal tak dapat pun. Suara ceria je. Rupa-rupanya dah keluar hospital and dapat mc 4 hari. And siap ajak pegi jogging lagi. Lepas tu dia ckp phone rosak sbb tak dapat msg dia, padahal okay je. So now dia siap nk belikan nombor topup lagi for me. Dude I'm about to break off with you! Haa kau nak beli noombor pulak untuk aku. Aku pun cepat-cepat lah cakap tak payah. HAHAHA jahat gila. Ingat nk tunggu dia keluar hospital baru nk bagi tahu nk break, ye lah kang kena heart attack pulak hehe. Tgk-tgk dah keluar. So I will wait for a suitable time to tell him. Tapi susah wei! Grr! -.-

Raya Oh Raya!

Dad's side, Kelantan. :)

Am I ready or not?

I keep asking myself whether am I ready or not to be in relationship. The answer is Yes if the guy is the one that I like for a long time. Like our crush! but when it comes to a friend or anonymous or someone that we don't have feeling, I feel confuse. Sometimes kita suka, sometimes tak. So macam mana tu. Rasa macam tak ready pun ye. Tapi nak ada boyfriend. Bila dah orang suka, tak nak pulak. Haishh kadang kadang aku pun tak paham. Mana satu ni sebenarnya.

So the problem is a friend of mine likes me, but I don't know how to react, since kitaorg dah lama tak jumpa dan I've been single so long. Dah tak reti dah pun nk in love in love ni. I'm a very different person. I like a relationship yang not too serious and not too main-main. Just hit the flow. Kalau panjang jodohnya tak kemana. So just be like best friend where we can share everything. The thing is kalau dah suka lepas tu break or ditolak dah tak kawan. Tak best lah macam tu.

About this guy tak tahu la, hati ni rasa macam tak masuk je dengan dia. Bukan sebab rumah besar kecik, kaya miskin, pandai tak pandai, cantik hodoh or tinggi rendah. It just not the right time. Since kita pun baru je jejak kasih balik and first time cakap on the phone and texting each other, bila terus nk in relationship macam too early. Dah la hati ni ada rasa suka kat orang lain, I mean crush lah kan. Tiba-tiba "Dia" muncul. Lagi pun tak biasa lah kalau nk keluar-keluar sbb kira macam baru kenal lah jugak. Sebab dulu kat sekolah senyum-senyum, cakap skit2 macam tu je. Ni terus ha bamm! I really appreciate that you are looking for me for a long time since we finished school and you asked our old friend to find me. But they blurr, "Liyana yang mana satu", till that day you came to my open house and finally we met. Thank you so much. Ada juga la orang ingat kat kita, thought nobody cares about me :P

So tak tahu  la macam mana, semalam macam okay juga kalau cuba why not kan, tapi hari ni rasa macam alah kawan je lah. So how! Duh! Rasa nak sembahyang istiqarah pun ye. Padahal baru benda kecil, bukan nak kawen pun hahaha Liyana you're so funny! :P end of the story kalau dia call angkat, kalau dia msg balas and just be friend. Hah terkeluar pun. So be friend okay! Bukan jual mahal it just, I'm not ready, cause he sound so serious, kalau break kan dia kecewa haa lagi lah kesian.


p/s: sorry for the long post, I know beleter je memanjang. Kalau pasal hati dan perasaan tak sah kalau tak tulis panjang. :P *Well actually I miss him, not him yang kawan lama bertemu kembali, I mean him, ynag selalu duk cerita kat previous post. yang dah ada girlpreng tu -.-*

Long post

Since my blog don't have many readers and follower compare to HanisZalikha or MariaElena, hehe so this blog become more personal. Eceh, to me lah kan. So about this guy, baru-baru ni kitaorg berjumpa so bila jumpa lain lah jadinya. Jumpa pun sebab raya kan. Hati tu rasa aii teringat-ingat balik. Padahal last post konon nk forget you forget me lah :P

I found out that his so-called girlpren ni duk post kat satu tempat ni lah. Yela pasal sayang sayang and what so ever. Eee menyamps pulak aku. Kononnya nnt nak kawen lah apa lah, lelaki yang terakhir la. Dush dush! Okay ye mmg jeles and menayampah. You know how you feel when your crush is in relationship with someone that you know and and younger that you. Mesti lah jeleskan geram kan. Kalau tak kau tak ada perasaan lah tu. Daa! Tapi dia pun macam happy je bersama, siapa tak happy tgh bercinta.

The point is kenapa aku dok gila sangat kat mamat tu. Korang kan kawan, baik lagi, rapat apa. Tapi kena tiba-tiba jadi macam ni? Grrr. Lagi pun aku pernah tanya/cakap dgn mama pasal budak ni. Time tu baru rasa sikit2 je suka, tapi bila dah plan nk pegi sini sana dah jadi lain pulak. Dia baik, tapi tu lah aku bukan lah untuk mu. Wah wah mak jemah, apahal kau ni sentimental sangat ni. Eee menyesal pun ada pg baca ayat-ayat dekat laman sesawang budak tu. Hmm tapi kadang-kadang rasa tak baik la, dah dia bukan untuk kita nak buat mcm mana kan. TAPI BELUM CUBA BELUM TAHU KAN KAN KAN! Haaa. Ok tarik nafas. Fuhh.

Aku ni pun jeles melebih buat apa, lupakan je lah. Doa kan dia bahagia. Kalau kita doakan kebaikan untuk org lain, malaikat pun doa untuk kita juga. Haissh. Tu la kan hati jahat.

Ni satu lagi, yang dikerja tak dapat yang digendong berciciran. Yg org punya or dah berpunya tu biar lah kan, ni bila ada org usha nak kawan mula la malu-malu, pastu rasa tak ready lah apa lah. Kenapa deangan aku ni? Apa yang aku nk sebenarnya? Too scared to be alone, too scared to open. So kau nak buat apa ni Liyana? Come on la umur dah 21, kang jual mahal tak laku. Bak kata Abdullahbros, "We need to readjust our standards, not lower them". Hmm lelaki ni jadi rebutan pulak. Tak pe tak lama lagi ko akan sambung belajar kan, tempat baru lagi kan. So ramai lagi ada kat sana yang perlu dikenali. Jadi lama-lama lupa lah tu :) Ohh panjang rumanya post ni, gilaa ah. Sorry banyak merapu. Assalamualikum, Selamat Malam. 


p/s: Fuhh lega sikit..

Forget You

First of all I would like to wish you all Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin. Kosong kosong lah ye bak kata najwa latip.Amacam duit raya banyak tak dapat? hehe

So about this guy, I'm actually start to to forget you bit by bit. Thought you're single but now you have someone new in your life. I don't like the relationship between you and that girl. Hati ni benci membuak-buak. But it's okay maybe ada hikmah disebalik ni. Mungkin kita tak sepadan or tak sesuai pun. But still, my heart can't accept if you're with someone else where you don't even mine. Well maybe I deserve better. So yeah I'll let you go. Please don't do anything that make me fall in love, please don't treat me like someone special, or please don't talk or promise anything that I will remember for a long time. I remember you've said this "sampai kucing bertanduk" pun kita tak kan jadi lebih dari kawan, sambil gelak-gelak. Well actually you're totally wrong, deep in my heart I had feeling towards you. But now I'm heart broken. Thank you very much.

Actually I'll be fine as long as he stay single.

Hi! I'm Chloé :)

Awal Ramadhan, Iftar.

Konon order makanan banyak, semua mcm rasa tak habis je. Sekali habis jugak ha. Banyak konon. :P

Just a post.

True. Keep to myself or talk to Allah. Allah is a good listener. :)

Tiba-tiba

Sesudah sahur dan baca quran tiba-tiba gatal tangan nak post some personal stuff yang duk main kat fikiran. Eceh bunyi nak best je, padahal tak best pong. Anyway semalam ada majlis berbuka puasa di Duta Village Resort bersama staff tempat kerja mama and family :) Nice la, makanan pun not bad. The most interesting part is I got chance to meet this guy yang mama ashik duk crita-crita selalu tu. Katanya handsome haha so excited la bila ada gathering dengan staff and family kikiki gatai na.

Sampai sana, makan-makan, lepas tu mata mula lah mengeliau cari si mamat ni. Ya Allah apa lah, tak puasa mata :P Haishh! Bila ada mamat ala-ala putih mcm mama describe, mula lah tanya, "yang ni ke ma?" "Yang ni ke baju stripe ni?" hahha I know gatal kan. Bukan gatal tapi curious laa! Sekali tekaan kedua betul ha mamat yang di teka tu. Haha finally I saw you man! Em tak lah handsome gilaaa! Tapi handsome lah haha boleh la, putih tinggi kurus. Lengkap lah tu, what else kan! :P Gedik weh!

Tapi tekaan pertama yang baju stripe tu pun not badddddd :D Handsome okay!!! Dah la tinggi, putih, mata sepet tapi bulu mata lentik! (lengakap aku tengok ha! :P Dah tu, first mesti la tgk mata ye dak :B)  cakap kat mama yang ni handsome juga! HAHAHA pastu mama cakap dia ni budak lab, ada lah juga mama dengar budak lab ni ada sorang handsome KAHKAHKAH. Tapi serius comel kot! Ala-ala Farid Kamil hehe. Cuma dia sweet skit :P Haa single or taken tu tak tahu waallahuallam. Pendek cerita tu je nak cerita haha tak de kerja. Biasa lah bujang kan mesti lah kena survey survey skit. Lalu aku pun berdoa agar dikurniakan lelaki yang bergitu tetapi mungkin yang lebih baik, inysAllah. Amin. Sebab kalau dia bukan untuk kita mungkin, untuk kita Allah beri yang lebih baik. Amin.

Laa panjang rupanya cerita kali ni. Tiba tibt nk post, hentam je lah. Okay selamat beramal di 10 malam terakhir Ramandhan :) Semoga ibadah kita diterima Allah inysAllah. Assalamualikum. :)



*P/S: Semoga kita jumpa lagi mamat baju stripe and so-called anak buah mama :P HEHEHE*

Lama dah.

Phewhhh =..=

You don't ever think of me.

get out from my mind, thank you.

Hi, my name is Chloé! :)

You ask me?

"It’s hard, you know? I look at you and it hurts so much to know that we can’t be together." -One Tree Hill (TV Series)


and yes I miss you..