Thursday, July 25, 2013

You

When I was in part 5 diploma I liked this guy, actually I don't like guys yang berbadan besar tapi dia different walaupun besar tapi I like him. Kitaorang selalu chat or sms. I like him but I never tell him that I like him. We been friends since part 1 diploma. Sebelum tu ada je minat dekat orang lain, tapi minat je la. I told mama that I liked him, then mama cakap bagi tahu lah dia kalau lambat melepas. Haha so tiba-tiba dapat tahu yg dia dah ada girlfriend! Dang kinda frustrated la and rasa nk menangis pun ada. Tu la first time rasa nak menangis pasal benda-benda mcm ni. Bila fikir balik entah apa-apa je haha.

Now, same feeling, I like this guy so much, I did mention in my old entries. He's my friend since primary school. Tapi kitaorang rapat start sekolah menengah, since satu kelas form 1 till form 3 kot. After that still rapat lagi walaupun lain-lain kelas, he further his studies at Johor and same goes to me. I remember we ride a same bus to Johor, but I stopped at Segamat and he change bus and stopped at Larkin. When I was in part 6 diploma, he keep asking me if I have a friend to "kanen" kan untuk dia. I mean dia nk like awek la or someone untuk berkenalan. Which that time, my male friends sebok suruh carikan masing-masing awek, ingat aku ni agent cari awek ke apa. Haha So back to the story, I gave him one of my girlfriends number, which I asked her permission first. So they always texting each other and the most annoying part was, when my friend don't replied his messages he will text me and asked why or what happen. Dusshh! (at that time I was kinda jealous haha :P) After that they stop contact each other and he had a new girlfriend. I remember one thing when he had crisis or problem with his girlfriend, he text me and I try to calm him and give some advice or opinion or any motivation to him. During Hari Raya he always came to my house with his friends. But lately when I finished my diploma, I stated like him, I like him so much. I don't know this could happen, because we were friends back then but now I like him a lot. Pfttt I hate that but that's the truth.

Until now I still like him and fall in love with him.  He has a girlfriend. That's the sad part, but before final exam last month he broke up. Till now I saw their picture together!! What the heck! I thought the broke up!! I asked my brother, he said that they just friends. FRIENDS? go out together, that's called friends? Okay fine, they are FRIENDS but I know that my friend still love her. He plan to get married with her. What the heck, she's still young! Now they broke up! Told ya! I don't mean to cakap buruk or doa yg tak baik it just, mcm tak masuk akal. Tu based on my investigation la hahaha.

So now I was so menyampah when I see them together! Hmm, I know he's not for me but at least find other girl! Why her! -.- So yeah again I like him a lot and yes I miss him a lot. I'm afraid to tell him that I like him, I don't want us to be strangers when I tell him about that, and I know mesti dia dah anggap sebagai kawan. Yes my friends said belum cuba belum tahu, and what if kalau cakap kat dia, dia pun accept ha. Tapiiii what if disebaliknya?! Hah tak ke mati! So that's my feeling right now, not now actually this feeling since I finished my diploma, even when I am in a relationship with someone. I still think of him, and I want him. GOD what's wrong with me! I pray to Allah if he's not for me, please stop me from liking him or miss him. Give me someone else that makes me more happier. Yeah I've been looking for someone to replace him. :p


(*apa aku merapu ni -.-)

p/s: Entah la sebenarnya kalau lah dapat dia pun, aku akan suka dia tak? or perasaan tu masih sama? Confuse.

2 comments:

DiNieezyANe said...

love or crush? two different things. hehe

Journalist said...

both maybe :P yes two different things. :)